Why, oh why are kids such freaking germ magnets? (That was a rhetorical question.) It's because they are so gross. They have an obsessive need to touch anything or anyone, they will continue talking to someone who is coughing directly in their face and they do a half-hearted job of washing their hands unless heavily supervised. And who pays the price? That's right, the parents. Your children are sick, but insist on trying to behave and run around and stand on their heads as though they are well and refuse to let their bodies rest, which makes them even crankier and more prone to spontaneous tears and yelling for seemingly no reason. They insist they do not not need to blow their nose, no matter how much they are sniffing. They refuse to drink fluids. They insist they feel fine, even though they have red, puffy eyes and a hacking cough, runny nose, and temperature.
And then you cannot go grocery shopping or take them to get a haircut or let them go to school or return your library books or go into the next room because they suddenly act as though you have disappeared into thin air and they cannot find you, which results in more fits. You are trapped inside all day with a wild little germ-ridden ball of freakish energy and crazy thoughts.
The season of sickness is the new festivus.
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