I have never before been this behind on Christmas. I still have presents to think up in addition to actually purchasing them. I haven't wrapped anything. I have no meal plans. No cookies. I don't know what I'm doing.

Luckily someone gifted Mort that Christmas countdown ornament so every two minutes or so he informs me of how much further I've fallen behind.

Someday I'm going to be old enough to go to an island for Christmas and not deal with any of this.