I gots to rant. You don't gotta read.

I was dropping off Mort at school and walking back to my car when one of the women who works at the school gave me a big smile and said to another school employee with a sigh, "Wouldn't you love to have the day off? I'd love to have the day off from work and throw on a hoodie and a pair of sweats," all the while smiling at me in my hoodie and sweats.

And to her I have several points I'd like to make:

1) I was wearing gym clothes because I was going to the gym, not because I have "off from work." I do not wear gym clothes in real life as I do not deem them acceptable. Gym clothes are for the gym. Period. That is not to say that I won't throw on a hoodie, but it will not be in conjunction with any other clothes that could be worn to the gym.

2) I did not have "off work" because I am a lazy-ass, bon-bon popping, soap opera watching stay-at-home mom that you see driving her kid to and fro school every day. I have a paying job from which I telecommute and by the way, I don't wear sweatpants for that either.

3) Even if I didn't have a paying job, my job as a stay-at-home mom is a JOB. It is work. It is every bit as valid and infinitely more important than sitting in an office all day and collecting doctor's excuses or whatever it is that you do. I am raising my child to be the best, happiest version of himself he can be. And if you think for a second that isn't work, than you must not have children or else you aren't staying at home to raise them. And by the way, I don't wear sweatpants for my job as a mother, either.

P.S. Yes, I recognize that I'm bringing a bit of my own insecurities and defensiveness to a seemingly innocent remark...or WAS IT?

Next up on the rant list is also directed at a woman who works at Mort's school. Mort used to come home from school with his entire lunch box full. He was going 8 hours having eaten NOTHING. That, to me, is pretty horrifying. This year, however, we have had a break through. And Mort now comes home with an empty lunch box, save for the crusts of his sandwich, which we as a family, have decided is perfectly acceptable. He eats all his packed veggies, all his packed fruit and all the parts of his sandwich that aren't touched by crusts. And yet this woman has taken it upon herself to start chiding Mort for not "doing a good job" eating his sandwich.

To which I would like to say, "Step off, yo." If you have a serious concern with what my child is eating, please schedule a meeting with his father and I and do not berate him for eating what we have decided will best work for him to provide him with a balanced lunch while he is at school. He is 6 and he just hears your criticism, not realizing you clearly have your own food demons. His crusts will not help the starving children in Africa or whatever your rationale may be.

Perhaps you could spend your lunch duty policing the kids who are buying their "lunches" and scooping up three desserts and nothing else. Or perhaps you could worry about the parents who are bringing large Cokes and a bag of fast food into school for lunch for their 6 year olds?

And now I feel better. Thank-you for your time.