Monday, July 18, 2011

This is making me crazy and quite frankly, I don't know where else to take it.

True Blood needs help, serious, serious help. And it has a whole host of books from which to pull, yet it opts not to do so. But Alan Ball, you are a talented and creative man, but dude, your writers suck. Your story lines suck. You are going to lose your audience and make True Blood go away.

It was bad enough when you devoted an entire season to Marianne, a character that is barely a blip in the books. But let's put that behind us and move on. Because that truly was unforgivable and I'm sure you must still feel shame when you think about that disaster.

Of course no one wants to watch the series as though it's a word-for-word play of the books. I get it. Lafayatte is a colorful character, it was smart to keep him instead of killing him off. I even can see why you have Tara on the show as Sookie needs a female friend in whom to confide. I think your decision to cast that particular actor as Tara was a crime against nature however and when she is on the screen must be watched with closed captioning and only one eye open. Perhaps we could have her killed off and reincarnated as a watchable actor without the grating voice and horrid faces?

And let's please leave Tara's mama dead where she belongs.

The whole Vampire League and King Bill and all--that's FINE. Wasn't in the books, but sure why not? It's interesting enough I suppose. But if I give you that plot line, you've got to sacrifice the Tommy/Sam plot. No one cares about Tommy. NO ONE. Put him and Joe Lee (Jolie?) and his mother in the ring and let them kill each other off. Cut your losses. Walk away. It's a waste of precious time. Alcide and Debbie are fine for now. The Jason story is grotesque and wrong. That is definitely one where you could have used a bit more book infusion.And let's dial down on the Jessica/Hoyt show. Jessica is cute, but let's put her more in the bit-player realm. And stop the nonsense with the fairies. There is a myriad of ways you could be going with that. Except for the one that you've chosen. It sucks. And Arlene--for the love of Pete-- she needs to be just the waitress at Merlotte's who says her goofy shite and that's that. A possessed baby? BORING. Because No One Cares.

Which brings me to the important part. You have a cult following with your casting of Eric. This season is supposed to be based on fan favorite Book Four. Yet the Eric/Sookie line has been downgraded to maybe 12 minutes per show. This entire season should be so heavily focused on that plot line that all other plots should be relegated to that lone 12 minutes. Every review is going nuts over Alexander whathisface's (let's just call him Eric) portrayal of a Ericless Eric. Let your actor fly, dude! Let he and Sookie play this out properly! And quit with the Marnie shit. She needs to stay hidden in the background where she belongs until the end.

Seriously dude, I can help you fix this mess. Call me.